I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
