some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
