Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
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