well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
