I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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