Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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