i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
After tacos, we're chasing women.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
