So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
