my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
