Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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