when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
