I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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