just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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