dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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