It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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