if you like me you must not know who I am
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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