I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i dont even know how to be here
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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