do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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