"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
