At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
