Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
