No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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