my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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