So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
