So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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