I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize