quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize