i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Alive.
So much puke
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
