girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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