I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
