You can't motorboat a personality
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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