omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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