well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
