How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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