I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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