How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
