Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
There are leaves in my underwear?
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