tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
