it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I need water and some morals
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
