we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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