he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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