I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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