So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
