I think I died a long time ago.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Randomize