idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
ttyl tear gas
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize