1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
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