k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
