So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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