Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize