I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
there was a trapeze. enough said
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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